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Day: July 9, 2002

A Message to the Bum Kissers

A Message to the Bum Kissers

I am just wondering, what is so attractive about my bum, (oops I am sorry) I mean, my bumper that every car and truck just can not resist trying to kiss it. I hate it when vehicles tailgate me. If they think that this is a way to make me go faster, well, they are certainly very very unsuccessful. These situations usually arise, when there is a car crawling slowly before me. Well, I can’t go any faster even if I want to, unless I ram into it, hoping that it will fly off and clear my way?? It is not my fault that it is a roadhog??!!

In times when I am genuinely slower than the cars behind me, but faster than the ones in the lane beside mine, I would usually swing into the slower lane after I have finished my share of overtaking. However tailgating me, just makes things worse. I will suddenly lose my ability to step hard on the accelerator, probably due to nervousness. You just can’t blame me for that. Not only that, it will be impossible to try to overtake me from the slower lane, because at that very instant, my foot will recover its reaction and stamped down on the accelerator. What a wierd reaction. I really should get the doctor to examine me. Well, I am so sorry if your blood boils and rises to an unhealthy level. Please do forgive me and stop tailgating me!