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Ming Ming’s Diary – I Don’t Want to Go to School

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Don’t Want to Go to School

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Super moody today…. 😩

Even the yummiest cookie tastes like 💩 without girls. What’s the meaning of life??

Wha..aaattt?! I’m overreacting?? Ok ok. Since I’m in a monk’s class, I’ll meditate to cool down. 🧘🏻‍♂️

Orhmm orhmm… where are the girls… orhmm orhmm… where girls… orhmm orhmm….

I haven’t been posting because I’ve been so so so depressed. Sigh….. 😞

Why?

Look at this 👇🏼

Depressing right??

What do you mean what’s wrong???

Look carefully (don’t blink!) 👇🏼

See the Problemo???

Nooo..?!

All the Mei meis are MISSING!!!

See!!! All boys in the class!!! Oh my Mei meis are gone! Oh Laura! Oh Taylor!!

Before the school holidays, my class was full of babes who milled around me for my attention and now…

Only boys!! I’m in an all boys class!! I’m in depression!! It’s what they call a monk’s class!!

Mama!! I want to change class! Or I’m going on STRIKE! No more going to school for me!!

Mama do you hear me???

Na ah! I’m not going to change my mind.

No school for me until you bring the girls back.

Meanwhile I’m going to homeschool myself. *reads my car car book*

And so… I went to school, to my monk’s class because Mama said the school fee has been paid and I must go to school, with or without girls in class.

Tough luck!

“Are you going to school to learn or to see girls?!” She asked.

I wanted to say “beo girls, of course!” But she looked so….

That I thought I’d better keep my big mouth shut….

Hey wait!! Who do we have here??? Looks like there’s a bit of rainbow 🌈 after the rain 🌧.

A Mei Mei! Someone up there must have heard my prayers.

Hey babe! My name’s Ming Ming. What’s yours? Can we be friends?

Awww owl, are you fine? Can I keep you for a pet?? *pats the owl lovingly.* what? Ok ok. Mustn’t get distracted. F.O.C.U.S.

Eating together at snack time.

Nom nom nom. Say, how do you find this class? Cool, right?? Will you stay? I can protect you. 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼

I can even give you my biscuit 🍪! Nah!

Huh? What do you mean? I’m coming on too strongly? Scare her away? Ok ok. Chill chill!

It wouldn’t do if she leaves the class and I’m back to facing 7 monks. 😱 Kill me pulease!

Gosh! There are owls lying everywhere. I just rescued one from the floor.

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Spy with My Little Eyes

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Spy with My Little Eyes

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“Ting ting!” My babe antennae is up!

I spy,

I spy with my little eyes,

A cute babe

Up ahead!

Hmmm… doesn’t quite rhyme. I’ll work harder on my prose.

Check out her innocent unassuming look. 😍

Awww… so sweet with the black clip on her hair.

Come to think of it, her face looks kind of familiar… *ponder* where have I seen her before??

Hmmm…. do I have a twin sister?

DAMNIT! WHO put that black clip on my hair?!?!

Now all the girls are going to think that I’m a damn SISSY!!!!!

RAWR!!!!

My Dream…..

My Dream…..

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NONONONO!!!

Mama!! You’ve got it wrong! I didn’t dream of Mei Meis! I dreamt of food!! Almond milk and bananas!!

Don’t you know that the way to a Man’s heart is through food. *gives you the evil eye*

Sigh…. *face palm*

I had a wonderful dream last night! 🥰

I dreamt… that I was lying in a banana raft (a raft made of bananas??) floating down a river of almond milk.

I was in paradise! Sigh! My 2 favourite food! When I was hungry, I nibbled on my raft. When I was thirsty, I drank from the river. Sigh…. BLISS…!

HEHEHEHE

Can’t help laughing when I recall my dream.

Overhead Mama talking Papa, “Wonder what beautiful dream he had last night. He kept laughing his HEHEHE!”

“It’s a pity I didn’t manage to take a photo of him!”

“Maybe he was dreaming of being surrounded by beautiful girls. So he giggled to himself??”

😤 What do adults know?!

Ming Ming’s Diary – Like a King!

Ming Ming’s Diary – Like a King!

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Sitting like a king (mama says I look like a Dua Pek Gong, whatever THAT means?!). That’s what I do best.

You may rise, my faithful subjects!

THAT’S NOT A POTTY! That’s my THRONE!!!

Someone said I looked like Jabba the Hutt sitting on the throne. I googled it. He looks like this!!

The one on the right, I’m deeply offended. 😡 Where’s the resemblance?! WHERE WHERE WHERE?!?

YOU are henceforth banished from my kingdom!

Me thinks I look more like Mr Handsome on the left.

*Blue Steel look*

Donch ya mess with me!! 💢👊🏼💢

Ming Ming’s Diary – Memorable Moment! 🥰

Ming Ming’s Diary – Memorable Moment! 🥰

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Shush! Updating my diary is a serious matter. *Frown* I must quickly record this down so that I don’t forget this memorable moment.

*candlelight snack time*

*romantic music playing in the background… “Old Macdonald had a farm Ee A Ee A Oooo….”*

Hmm… I wonder if I need to arrange for some entertainment… How about a magic trick that I have just learnt?? (Heard that girls like to be wowed by magic tricks..)

OK… Watch my hand closely…

(Shakes hand vigorously) Do you see my hand disappear?? Do you do you??

Darn! She doesn’t look too impressed…😒

Sigh. I think I should just eat my food. Don’t waste good food. Girls are so hard to please nowadays.

Munch munch munch. Hey! These loops are quite yummy!

Am mmmm mumm mumm…

Ohh table manners, Ming Ming!!

So tasty that I’m licking my fingers and thumb and palm and everything!

Hmmm… Last one…

I wonder if Laura will give me some of hers. I mean girls are ALWAYS on diet right???

Laura… May I have some of yours????

Don’t waste food. Let me help you finish them???? *best smile*

How are your froot loops dear? Are they done to your taste?

This restaurant has a nice ambience. I have specially requested them to play your favourite song. 😍😍😍

It’s art time now.

Why are my eyes closed?? Like the great Mingcasso, I need to conceptualise the painting in mind.

*focus focus*

Ah! I have an inspiration!!!

Yes! A dash of yellow here! A dab of green there! Watch the Raining Sun master at work!

Eh! What do you mean I look like a dog with my tongue sticking out???

Orh!! Are you calling Einstein a dog?!

That’s the trademark of genius at work! 😛

Mommy, I’ve 2 Girlfriends!

Mommy, I’ve 2 Girlfriends!

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It’s the favourite time of my day! After lights out, we have our little chit chat in the dark.

小小宝贝 ：Mommy! I’ve 2 girlfriends! ?? ??

宝贝口水妹：What?! I don’t even have a boyfriend and you have TWO girlfriends??

Me : Are you sure they are your girlfriends!?

小小宝贝：Yes! (He insisted) Both of them said they liked me! ☺️ And I like them too!

Me : Erm, Lezen and Clara?

小小宝贝 ：(giggled) Yes!

Me : Didn’t you say that Elijah (his bff) likes Lezen?

小小宝贝：Since I’ve 2 girlfriends, I can give him one. (So generous of him ??‍♀️)

宝贝口水妹：How can you give girlfriends away???

小小宝贝： Because Lezen told him that she liked him too! So I’ll give him Lezen and we can both have girlfriends.

宝贝口水妹：Do you know what’s a girlfriend??? Not just any girl who is your friend ok!!

小小宝贝：Of course I know! All the girls in my class like me, but I only like 2!

Gosh! I’ve a Casanova in the household… ?

A Seat Full of Puke ?

A Seat Full of Puke ?

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Too fast, too furious, it happened. Out of the blue, we heard a retching sound, then when I turned around, I could only gape in horror as brown gooey liquid gushed out, non stop, of 小小宝贝’s mouth. 

“Don’t move! Don’t touch anything! Don’t touch the car!!! This is a nuclear disaster!!”

小小宝贝 sat in his vomit, stunned, with his hands held up in the air. It’s his maiden vomiting experience. 

Hub was driving and asking, “what happened?!”

宝贝reacted the quickest, “Give Didi some tissue!!!”

(Side story : Seow told me that her student puked in the car and some fluid flew over her Dad, who was the driver and in shock, he swerved and almost caused an accident. So we had been extremely lucky that his wasn’t the explosive, fly everywhere kind. Or we may have to scrap the car!)

宝贝 : Haha! Remember the last time I vomited all over the stairs as I was going to my bedroom?? 

Images of the last puking incident appeared vividly in my mind. Yes. She threw up as she was going up the stairs to her room. It splashed everywhere at the stairwell, over the railings (you can imagine that the puke went to the lower floor as well) and I saw food lumps and stomach acid cascading down the stairs…. we spent the whole night cleaning 2 floors. 

Me : Not funny ok! 

When we got home, we unbuckled the whole car seat and lifted him along with it straight into the bathroom. Hub cleaned him up while I wiped the car down and left the windows down to air it…. ?

We stood and stared at the car seat, a few bowls worth of puke, a lot of undigested food and unknown (you don’t want to know) stuff pooled on it. 

Me : Can still use or not? Throw away arh? But very expensive leh…

Hub : I’ll settle it! 

Me : ? My hero!!! Cleaning up the aftermath of a nuclear warfare! 

Somehow he managed it. The next time I saw the car seat it was dismantled and clean and drying at the balcony. We washed the covers a few times in the washing machine and it’s good as new. 

We survived! 

Meanwhile, 小小宝贝 is stricken with probably stomach flu. 


This reminds me of another time, when he covered me with shit. ?

I’m sure every parent out there must have experienced some form of disaster originating from one of the orifices of their children’s. But we soldier on! ??

His Favourite (Everchanging) Colour!

His Favourite (Everchanging) Colour!

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Raised the same way, but yet so different… 

During her early years, her favourite colour was green. Maybe it’s because some of our walls were green and we had lots of home decoration in that colour. And I dressed her in neutral colours and a pink or red once in a while. A few years ago, she declared that her favourite colours were pink and purple and they’ve remained since then. Sigh. There are just some things that can’t be changed. Why must little girls like pink?!

When he was very little (I mean when he was a wee babe, because he’s still very little now), he decided (yes, decided, no one could change his mind), that HIS favourite colour was PINK?!?! 


He ursuped his sister’s pink hat and wore it everywhere he went, including at home….

One fine day, he announced that his favourite colour was “rainbow”. So he started the era of putting as many different colours possible in every of his art pieces. 


A ? coloured “Yang Yang De Yi”. 


His ultra colourful house. 

Then came… 


The Black Age…. he coloured his drawing in various colours, then painted over the colours in BLACK!! ??‍♀️

He insisted that black was THE colour and wanted to be dressed in black clothes!! All his paintings were in black! Don’t ask me why a 4 year old would choose black as his favourite colour… 

Until yesterday. 

小小宝贝 : Mommy, I love orange!

Me : Eh, isn’t black your current favourite colour??

小小宝贝 : No! It’s ORANGE! Mommy, do you know why I love orange?

Me : ??

小小宝贝 ： Your favourite colour is red! So mine is orange. Because that’s the closest colour to red!! BECAUSE WE ARE CLOSE!! Right, Mommy??? 

Awww…. *melting* ?? 

Displaced by Technology

Displaced by Technology

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The hub is on an overseas business trip (yes, again!) so I am the “Tchaikovsky” for the fortnight (next week, too!). I kind of like driving the kiddos to school. All of us are stuck with one another in the car, all strapped in, no distractions like toys and all.

小小宝贝 : I like Google Home so much! (gushing over the darn machine enthusiastically)

Me : (what the…?! Ah ah.. no swearing…) (in my most gentle mommy voice) Why is that so?

宝贝 : Di di talks to it all the time!

小小宝贝 : You were not at home. So I asked Google, “Why is the sky blue? Why is the sun yellow? Why are the clouds white?” And the Google was so smart!! She knows all the answers!

Me : So what did she tell you?

小小宝贝 : Oh I have forgotten.

Me : Do you want to know the answers? (finally my chance to impress my son!)

小小宝贝 ：It’s ok. I will go home and ask Google after school today. She is always there! I can always ask her! (Is he subtly trying to tell me something??!!)

I swear I’m going home to trash that gadget today!

#jealousofagadget #displacedbytechnology #ihategooglehome #machinesaretakingover #quitmyjobandstayathome #afteritrashgooglehome

Destroy and Conquer! Zhiwei 1 Google Home 0

 

??Santa Claus is Coming to Town!??

??Santa Claus is Coming to Town!??

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小小宝贝 has been in the Christmas mood for the last few months. I’ve been having live carolling in the house. BUT he has a quirky talent of changing the lyrics to suit himself. ?

You better watch out

You better not cry

You better not pout

I’m telling you why 

Santa Claus is coming to town 


He sees you when you’re pee-peeing 

He knows when you are awake 

He knows if you’ve been bad or good

So be good for goodness sake 


Me : Eh it doesn’t sound very right. Can you sing the part “he sees you when you’re…” again??

小小宝贝 : ?He sees you when you’re PEE-PEEING?

Me : pee-peeing!? Isn’t it sleeping?! 

小小宝贝 : No. Pee-peeing. Cannot dirty the toilet! Must pee into the toilet bowl! (Indignantly) Not sleeping!!! 

Me : ok ok. It does make sense. 

小小宝贝 continued his carolling, very smugly.