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小小宝贝’s First ePTM

小小宝贝’s First ePTM

The first ePTM (parent teacher meeting) ever since he started primary school. We didn’t have one last year due to covid.

“I can’t believe it! 弟弟‘s teachers said he’s such a well behaved boy in class, very quiet (huh!!!) not a social butterfly (huh!!), very focused and attentive blah blah blah. His Chinese teacher even said he’s the most responsible 小组长 and can be entrusted with everything. When I told them he made friends with the boy standing behind him while queueing for chicken rice, they were totally surprised!”

姐姐-“Erm Mummy, did you remember to write his name as your nick when you joined the zoom meeting?”

“Hmm… I forgot. I used my own name.” “Maybe they thought you were another student’s Mummy and they were not referring to him. 🤷🏻‍♀️”
“Good point there!! There were talking about his classmate and not him!”

弟弟-“I’m a very good boy in school ok!!! 😡”

“Then why are you so naughty at home? I’m going to send your home videos to your teachers so that they can see your true colours!!”
“Nooo….!!!! 😭” #evilmom #siginna #devilathomeangelinschool

That’s his art homework (surrealism – incorporate a vegetable or fruit into drawing). A cucumber boat.

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Don’t Want to Go to School

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Don’t Want to Go to School

Super moody today…. 😩

Even the yummiest cookie tastes like 💩 without girls. What’s the meaning of life??

Wha..aaattt?! I’m overreacting?? Ok ok. Since I’m in a monk’s class, I’ll meditate to cool down. 🧘🏻‍♂️

Orhmm orhmm… where are the girls… orhmm orhmm… where girls… orhmm orhmm….

I haven’t been posting because I’ve been so so so depressed. Sigh….. 😞

Why?

Look at this 👇🏼

Depressing right??

What do you mean what’s wrong???

Look carefully (don’t blink!) 👇🏼

See the Problemo???

Nooo..?!

All the Mei meis are MISSING!!!

See!!! All boys in the class!!! Oh my Mei meis are gone! Oh Laura! Oh Taylor!!

Before the school holidays, my class was full of babes who milled around me for my attention and now…

Only boys!! I’m in an all boys class!! I’m in depression!! It’s what they call a monk’s class!!

Mama!! I want to change class! Or I’m going on STRIKE! No more going to school for me!!

Mama do you hear me???

Na ah! I’m not going to change my mind.

No school for me until you bring the girls back.

Meanwhile I’m going to homeschool myself. *reads my car car book*

And so… I went to school, to my monk’s class because Mama said the school fee has been paid and I must go to school, with or without girls in class.

Tough luck!

“Are you going to school to learn or to see girls?!” She asked.

I wanted to say “beo girls, of course!” But she looked so….

That I thought I’d better keep my big mouth shut….

Hey wait!! Who do we have here??? Looks like there’s a bit of rainbow 🌈 after the rain 🌧.

A Mei Mei! Someone up there must have heard my prayers.

Hey babe! My name’s Ming Ming. What’s yours? Can we be friends?

Awww owl, are you fine? Can I keep you for a pet?? *pats the owl lovingly.* what? Ok ok. Mustn’t get distracted. F.O.C.U.S.

Eating together at snack time.

Nom nom nom. Say, how do you find this class? Cool, right?? Will you stay? I can protect you. 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼

I can even give you my biscuit 🍪! Nah!

Huh? What do you mean? I’m coming on too strongly? Scare her away? Ok ok. Chill chill!

It wouldn’t do if she leaves the class and I’m back to facing 7 monks. 😱 Kill me pulease!

Gosh! There are owls lying everywhere. I just rescued one from the floor.

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Spy with My Little Eyes

Ming Ming’s Diary – I Spy with My Little Eyes

“Ting ting!” My babe antennae is up!

I spy,

I spy with my little eyes,

A cute babe

Up ahead!

Hmmm… doesn’t quite rhyme. I’ll work harder on my prose.

Check out her innocent unassuming look. 😍

Awww… so sweet with the black clip on her hair.

Come to think of it, her face looks kind of familiar… *ponder* where have I seen her before??

Hmmm…. do I have a twin sister?

DAMNIT! WHO put that black clip on my hair?!?!

Now all the girls are going to think that I’m a damn SISSY!!!!!

RAWR!!!!

My Dream…..

My Dream…..

NONONONO!!!

Mama!! You’ve got it wrong! I didn’t dream of Mei Meis! I dreamt of food!! Almond milk and bananas!!

Don’t you know that the way to a Man’s heart is through food. *gives you the evil eye*

Sigh…. *face palm*

I had a wonderful dream last night! 🥰

I dreamt… that I was lying in a banana raft (a raft made of bananas??) floating down a river of almond milk.

I was in paradise! Sigh! My 2 favourite food! When I was hungry, I nibbled on my raft. When I was thirsty, I drank from the river. Sigh…. BLISS…!

HEHEHEHE

Can’t help laughing when I recall my dream.

Overhead Mama talking Papa, “Wonder what beautiful dream he had last night. He kept laughing his HEHEHE!”

“It’s a pity I didn’t manage to take a photo of him!”

“Maybe he was dreaming of being surrounded by beautiful girls. So he giggled to himself??”

😤 What do adults know?!

Ming Ming’s Diary – Amazing Race

Ming Ming’s Diary – Amazing Race

While Mama was having team building and Papa was working, we were having our own amazing race at home!!

Jie Jie!! That’s a foul! You are blocking me from getting the the pit stop!!

Jie Jie!! 😡

Rule of the game : whoever gets there 2nd wins the game! Cool ya??

And the winner gets a sticker on the face!! Check out my trophies! *points to stickers on my face*

HEHEHEHEHE!!

Weird… why is everyone giving me strange looks???

They look at me, then point at me and start to giggle. 😒

Hmm…

Oh well, it must be the stickers that enhanced my looks so much that people take notice of me.

Or are they awed by my chariot riding skills??

Ehhh! Someone, tell me!! You there!! Stop laughing!!!

Ming Ming’s Diary – Feeling Depressed

Ming Ming’s Diary – Feeling Depressed

Dear 熊宝宝 aka Bear Baby, I’m feeling very depressed today. 😞

Someone said that I looked like Jabba the Hutt. I’ve been sitting in front of the mirror for the whole day (That’s why I haven’t been blogging), looking at myself.

Do I really look like that fat slob?!?!

熊宝宝, tell me the truth!! *breathes deeply* C’mon! Give it to me! Spit it out! I can take it! I’m a MAN! *thumps fist on chest*

*puts ear near Bear Baby’s mouth*

Really? I don’t look like Jabba??

Awww…! 熊宝宝 you are truly my one and only friend!!

Huggies!! Muak Muak! 🥰🥰🥰😘😘😘😍😍😍

Ming Ming’s Diary – Like a King!

Ming Ming’s Diary – Like a King!

Sitting like a king (mama says I look like a Dua Pek Gong, whatever THAT means?!). That’s what I do best.

You may rise, my faithful subjects!

THAT’S NOT A POTTY! That’s my THRONE!!!

Someone said I looked like Jabba the Hutt sitting on the throne. I googled it. He looks like this!!

The one on the right, I’m deeply offended. 😡 Where’s the resemblance?! WHERE WHERE WHERE?!?

YOU are henceforth banished from my kingdom!

Me thinks I look more like Mr Handsome on the left.

*Blue Steel look*

Donch ya mess with me!! 💢👊🏼💢

Ming Ming’s Diary – Memorable Moment! 🥰

Ming Ming’s Diary – Memorable Moment! 🥰

Shush! Updating my diary is a serious matter. *Frown* I must quickly record this down so that I don’t forget this memorable moment.

*candlelight snack time*

*romantic music playing in the background… “Old Macdonald had a farm Ee A Ee A Oooo….”*

Hmm… I wonder if I need to arrange for some entertainment… How about a magic trick that I have just learnt?? (Heard that girls like to be wowed by magic tricks..)

OK… Watch my hand closely…

(Shakes hand vigorously) Do you see my hand disappear?? Do you do you??

Darn! She doesn’t look too impressed…😒

Sigh. I think I should just eat my food. Don’t waste good food. Girls are so hard to please nowadays.

Munch munch munch. Hey! These loops are quite yummy!

Am mmmm mumm mumm…

Ohh table manners, Ming Ming!!

So tasty that I’m licking my fingers and thumb and palm and everything!

Hmmm… Last one…

I wonder if Laura will give me some of hers. I mean girls are ALWAYS on diet right???

Laura… May I have some of yours????

Don’t waste food. Let me help you finish them???? *best smile*

How are your froot loops dear? Are they done to your taste?

This restaurant has a nice ambience. I have specially requested them to play your favourite song. 😍😍😍

It’s art time now.

Why are my eyes closed?? Like the great Mingcasso, I need to conceptualise the painting in mind.

*focus focus*

Ah! I have an inspiration!!!

Yes! A dash of yellow here! A dab of green there! Watch the Raining Sun master at work!

Eh! What do you mean I look like a dog with my tongue sticking out???

Orh!! Are you calling Einstein a dog?!

That’s the trademark of genius at work! 😛

Mommy, I’ve 2 Girlfriends!

Mommy, I’ve 2 Girlfriends!

It’s the favourite time of my day! After lights out, we have our little chit chat in the dark.

小小宝贝 :Mommy! I’ve 2 girlfriends! ?? ??

宝贝口水妹:What?! I don’t even have a boyfriend and you have TWO girlfriends??

Me : Are you sure they are your girlfriends!?

小小宝贝:Yes! (He insisted) Both of them said they liked me! ☺️ And I like them too!

Me : Erm, Lezen and Clara?

小小宝贝 :(giggled) Yes!

Me : Didn’t you say that Elijah (his bff) likes Lezen?

小小宝贝:Since I’ve 2 girlfriends, I can give him one. (So generous of him ??‍♀️)

宝贝口水妹:How can you give girlfriends away???

小小宝贝: Because Lezen told him that she liked him too! So I’ll give him Lezen and we can both have girlfriends.

宝贝口水妹:Do you know what’s a girlfriend??? Not just any girl who is your friend ok!!

小小宝贝:Of course I know! All the girls in my class like me, but I only like 2!

Gosh! I’ve a Casanova in the household… ?

A Seat Full of Puke ?

A Seat Full of Puke ?

Too fast, too furious, it happened. Out of the blue, we heard a retching sound, then when I turned around, I could only gape in horror as brown gooey liquid gushed out, non stop, of 小小宝贝’s mouth. 

“Don’t move! Don’t touch anything! Don’t touch the car!!! This is a nuclear disaster!!”

小小宝贝 sat in his vomit, stunned, with his hands held up in the air. It’s his maiden vomiting experience. 

Hub was driving and asking, “what happened?!”

宝贝reacted the quickest, “Give Didi some tissue!!!”

(Side story : Seow told me that her student puked in the car and some fluid flew over her Dad, who was the driver and in shock, he swerved and almost caused an accident. So we had been extremely lucky that his wasn’t the explosive, fly everywhere kind. Or we may have to scrap the car!)

宝贝 : Haha! Remember the last time I vomited all over the stairs as I was going to my bedroom?? 

Images of the last puking incident appeared vividly in my mind. Yes. She threw up as she was going up the stairs to her room. It splashed everywhere at the stairwell, over the railings (you can imagine that the puke went to the lower floor as well) and I saw food lumps and stomach acid cascading down the stairs…. we spent the whole night cleaning 2 floors. 

Me : Not funny ok! 

When we got home, we unbuckled the whole car seat and lifted him along with it straight into the bathroom. Hub cleaned him up while I wiped the car down and left the windows down to air it…. ?

We stood and stared at the car seat, a few bowls worth of puke, a lot of undigested food and unknown (you don’t want to know) stuff pooled on it. 

Me : Can still use or not? Throw away arh? But very expensive leh…

Hub : I’ll settle it! 

Me : ? My hero!!! Cleaning up the aftermath of a nuclear warfare! 

Somehow he managed it. The next time I saw the car seat it was dismantled and clean and drying at the balcony. We washed the covers a few times in the washing machine and it’s good as new. 

We survived! 

Meanwhile, 小小宝贝 is stricken with probably stomach flu. 


This reminds me of another time, when he covered me with shit. ?

I’m sure every parent out there must have experienced some form of disaster originating from one of the orifices of their children’s. But we soldier on! ??